Finding Motivation – and Staying Motivated

We all know those people who are always so upbeat ... so lively ... so positive that they irritate the life out of us. Why can't they just go away and leave us alone?

 So what makes them so different from you and me?

Well chances are very few of these up-beat people are like that all the time. That's like expecting a comedian to spend their every waking moment making jokes, or a carer to never want a minute to care for themselves rather than others. But these people have learned that there is only one way to make sure things get done and move on in life, and that's to find motivation and stay motivated. And they've also found that this doesn't always come naturally, but it is a skill that can be learned.

Before we go any further I've a confession to make: I have a wide strip of laziness inside me. Give me a choice and chances are I'll choose the easiest option I can, especially if 'do nothing' is on the list. What makes it worse is that I live in a beautiful part of Greece, just a few kilometers from the sea and some of the most beautiful beaches you've seen: soft golden sand, gently shelving shoreline, clear warm sea. So when I'm faced with the choice of going to the beach for the day, or staying indoors and sitting at my keyboard it seems like a no-brainer.

But when I choose the beach, it's me who's got no brain. Why? Because lying on the beach doesn't buy me food, and swimming in the sea doesn't put petrol in my car.

The people I used to work with wouldn't recognize this streak of laziness. If you asked them they would say I was very motivated, always working long hours, focusing on the things I needed to do, and keeping them on track as their manager. What they didn't know was that I regularly struggled to find the motivation to get myself to work in the morning, especially when things weren't going so well.

I often felt unfulfilled by the work I was doing, but I had to grit my teeth and get on with it, working through the difficult times until I came out the other side. I had to find some way to keep going. I had to find motivation and stay motivated.

Finding Motivation

It doesn't matter whether we're talking about a new job or a new relationship, it's a great feeling when you start something brand new: you're interested, you're learning things, you want things to work out well. In fact finding motivation and staying motivated feels as natural as waking up each morning. But then a few days, weeks or months down the line what happens? You're not quite as keen, the new things don't seem as interesting, you don't feel like trying as hard any more. And this is where the danger lurks...

Just like a ball that's been rolled and gradually comes to a stop as friction overpowers its momentum, as soon as your motivation starts to disappear so does the force that keeps you moving in the right direction, and before you know it you've ground to a complete halt. Getting motivated again becomes more difficult than you might imagine, especially as this is the ideal time for doubt and fear to get a hold.

Sound familiar? Do you have a storehouse of unfinished projects that speak loudly about your difficulties in staying motivated: that course that you never completed, that expensive new hobby which lasted just a few months, that simple DIY job you started months ago, that fascinating couple you got on with so well on holiday last year but never got round to staying in touch with...

Okay, maybe in some cases you can justify what happened: maybe you didn't have the money to keep up the hobby, maybe the course wasn't quite what you thought. In these cases part of the problem could be that you picked the wrong thing in the first place, but you know that part of it was down to you: it was too easy to decide not to get the car out again on a cold and wet evening to drive to college. It was just too easy to get out of the habit of staying motivated...

Staying Motivated

So what can you do about it?

Well the first step is to accept that you are going to have to work at it. You can get people to help you, but when it comes down to it, only you can really motivate yourself. You know this is true — think of those times when others try to encourage you. It only works if you want it to; if you don't, they can spend as much time as they want trying to get you moving, After all, it's their time they're wasting.

Ten two-letter words to remember:

Here are some guidelines to follow to help you find motivation and stay motivated:

Be Really Clear About What You Are Trying to Achieve

It's hard to stay motivated when what you're aiming for is vague, like trying to catch snowflakes — as soon as you get close enough to hold them, they melt. So start by doing some thinking: what exactly do you want to do, why, when by, and how will you know when you've achieved it? Why is probably the most important question — if you don't have a good reason for what you are doing, you'll struggle to stay motivated when any distractions come along.

Believe It's Possible

The first people who reached the summit of Mount Everest knew they were up against a challenge but it didn't stop them. They believed it could be done — and they believed they could do it, even though others had previously failed.

Do you believe in what you're doing?

DO you believe YOU can do it?

It's impossible to stay motivated if you don't believe in what you're doing. Every time you turn to face forward some niggling doubt will try to turn you around again. If you aren't committed to what you're doing, you'll quickly find lots of reasons to avoid it.

It's much easier to be motivated about something that interests you and that you want to do. But it is also possible to find motivation and stay motivated about something that you know you have to do, even if it's not your choice, like a work related task that you don't really enjoy but is important to complete.

Remind Yourself Why

If you're struggling to keep motivated in a new challenge such as learning a new skill or going into business for yourself, take a step back and remind yourself of the reasons why you decided to do it in the first place. Get a piece of paper and write the heading Why I Decided to Do X. Write down all the ideas that come to you — everything you can think of that contributed to you making the decision in the first place.

Your list will either get you back on track, or show you that you have made a wrong choice. In which case you need to find something else.

If your struggle is because you're doing something you don't want to, but have to, you can use a similar tactic. This time you'll be looking at what's important about completing X, and what benefits you'll get by doing it. Do something you don't want to before something you want to do. Find motivation by telling yourself that after completing X you can focus on the things that interest you, and stay motivated by reminding yourself that as soon as you finish X you can move on.

Stay Motivated By Using Chunks and Rewards

Sometimes it's hard to find motivation because the task seems so big or complicated: you just don't know where to start. The solution is to break the final target down into smaller, manageable stages or chunks, which then become totally do-able.

Milestones were used to tell travelers how far they were from their destination. Imagine you're making a hundred mile trip — wouldn't you want to know every time you've covered 10 miles? Wouldn't this make you feel closer to the end of your journey and put a spring in your step?

Set milestones for yourself and give yourself rewards each time you reach one. Praise yourself mentally but also have some sort of treat. Everyone responds to praise and reward, and it's a good way of stoking up your motivation. Seeing how far you've come and what you've achieved, and feeling good about yourself for doing it, automatically makes you want to do more. And that little treat, whatever it is, also makes you look forward to the next one.

Give Yourself a Break!

No-one can keep going without a break. Feeling you have to keep pushing away at something relentlessly is bound to affect your motivation — you get jaded, your inspiration falters, problems seem much bigger.

So build some down time into your plans. And make sure you do it properly. Walk away from the task you are focused on and do something different, something that will invigorate you both physically and mentally. When you get back to your task you will feel motivated and ready to go again.

I set myself targets for the amount of work I do at one time, and once I've done this I can do something I want to — read a book, go for a walk, watch a movie or just relax. And I also give myself a couple of days off each week, days when I can plan to do something else completely.

What I usually find is that while I'm on my down time the ideas start coming — solutions to problems, new directions to explore, better ways to do what I'm currently working on. I write them down so I won't forget them, but I don't do anything about them straight away. My down time is valuable as well. Then when I do start again I'm at a higher level of activity, interest and motivation than before.

Staying Motivated Through Setbacks

In almost everything you do you'll come up against obstacles and setbacks. In fact, if you do something where this doesn't happen, it's probably luck rather than anything else. It's easy for obstacles to knock your motivation, and where there are several obstacles to overcome it can get even more difficult to stay motivated.

Thomas Edison didn't give up when many thousands of experiments went wrong. He believed it was possible to create light using electricity and he believed that, if he tried for long enough he'd work out how to do it. He found the motivation to keep trying different things and stayed motivated despite lots of disappointments. We'd all be in the dark if he'd given up after the first few failures.

Sometimes your momentum is slowed by others who just don't deliver as quickly as you need them to. Don't let delays hold you back: are there other things you could be doing while you wait? Is there a different source for this input? Is there any way you can hurry things along?

Always agree deadlines and timescales when working with other people, so everyone knows where they stand. Ask for regular updates and don't be afraid — or slow — to chase up on missed deadlines or commitments.

If Plan A doesn't work, move on to Plan B, then Plan C. You'll learn as you go along, and not only will you get there, you'll find that Plan H is actually better than Plan A would have been.

Every salesman knows that a 'No' brings them one person closer to a 'Yes'...

Hannibal did get those elephants and an army over the alps...

Keep Company With Positive, Motivated People

One of the easiest ways to destroy your motivation is to hang around with people who find the negative in everything. Just being around them rubs off on you. It's hard to find motivation for anything when the people around you are down on everything.

You may not be able to totally avoid contact with negative people, especially if they include work colleagues and family members. Don't try to deal with their negativity — the fight will wear you down. And don't share you ideas and plans with them if you don't think you'll get positive support. It's hard to stay motivated when someone who matters to you has rubbished your plans.

Share your ideas with trusted friends, family and colleagues who you know will give you positive support and feed your motivation. If you can't find anyone to do this with try these:

Read about successful people and those that overcame significant obstacles. Learn from people who found courage against the odds. Their stories can be inspirational, and motivational and there's sure to be someone who you can relate to

Use the internet to find people with similar interests to yours. You'll find people are very willing to help with encouragement or information, and building some contacts will help you stay motivated

Look for a local group or course that fits in with your goals and get involved. Being with others who have similar goals is an excellent way to stay motivated

It only takes one or two positive people on your side to stop the negative doubters being able to get their hooks into you.

Do Just One Thing

You've heard it before, but it really is the crux of the matter. Your thinking time is over for now. You'll never stay motivated unless and until you take action. It doesn't have to be a big thing. Just choose one thing that you need to do to start you moving towards your goal, then do it, whether you feel like it or not.

Make that phone call you've been putting off ... buy a newspaper to look through the vacancies ... arrange to meet someone who can help with your plans ... do some research on the internet ... ask about courses at your local college...

It actually doesn't matter what you do, as long as you do something ... anything.

As soon as you make a start things will change. Fears and doubts will have a different perspective. Your satisfaction in having done something will improve your self confidence. And as you complete a task you will have something to file on the positive side. Each small task will build until you find you've reached a bigger milestone than you realized. And the more you do it, the stronger you become to repel the doubters — both internal and external.

If you don't enjoy your work it can be hard to find motivation for it, and stay motivated day after day. Read more about finding motivation and staying motivated at work